Category: Uncategorized

   -What up Bitches! Kenny vs Spenny is a cool show, and you know i think it’d be cool to have some competitions of our own. Too bad you won’t know any of them you fucking asshole. sorry i apologize. Really though it’s a cool show. Mainly because there’s nothing else to watch. No more south park, no more sunny. honestly, i have nothing to do now. Also i hate SUPA economics. No matter how hard i try i can’t fucking get a good grade. so i decided to stop doing homework and she catches me and is a bitch to me. yea.

    -Oh, i don’t know if i wrote this but tim and jackie broke up. It’s weird because everything in my screenplays happened, almost. not really but it kinda did cause i went off on dorothy and everyone cheered, it was cool. Unfortunately to my dismay, jackie will not have sex with will to make tim jealous. She is so dumb but she has a cool house and likes to drive.

    -Everything is really hazy right now, i am confused about many things and i wouldn’t mind another snow day just to get things straight again. well, time to get a girlfriend. catch ya later. Also i want to learn this cool dance.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iXJIKoxWzFk&w=425&h=355]

    Welcome welcome. I enjoy writing. a lot. Honestly, i wonder who reads my xanga. i need a tracker thing so i’ll know all the amazing people reading my blog. I think this is the longest running website i’ve had. awesome. now onto the good stuff.

    I would like to retract what i said about mr.gale. He has infact a fucking asshole. In all honesty, i think i did a pretty swell job on that motivational speech. Fuck, even i went out to get some windex. It was very fucking original because no one would do it. what  a fucking dick. He better not google Mr.Gale or he’ll find my xanga. I am will metro.
    i don’t feel like writing anymore. sorry.

    -Everyone should have a blog even if they are illiterate. It’s like an extension to your life. You write down shit you want to remember and then you read it years later and remember how retarded you are. So with that said, i hope that some of you are inspired to get a blog. Xanga is free, and it’s cooler then myspace or facebook. in which i also have but rarely use.

    -I know i got a lot of people waiting for episode 6. As fucked up as my writing is, normal people still want to read it. which is beyond me. The shit i write…… i am seriously going to hell. Are we ever going to film this shit? It would be a lot cooler i think. But the materials we need will be extremely hard to obtain. Let alone somehow getting dorothy to say her lines. I guess we can edit it or something.

    -Other news, the talent show was decent. and i’m being very generous when i say “decent”. I had no power as host. they just wanted me to do stupid things that no one else would fucking do. I only contributed 1 skit out of 14 gay skits. Everyone who tried out made it except Andrew Manous which i thought should have made it. Speaking of Acts, i thought all of them sucked except me, the copelands, and JD. Thats just what i think. There was too many Piano + Singing. I had a band so that was cool. Although i will never have alahandro as my drummer ever again. Perhaps the next talent show will be great. Perhaps i will have more authority. perhaps i can contribute more usefully.

    -Dude, is it cool if i bear my soul for a minute? you know there’s like this Ultimate high school experience. and how it only comes around once in a lifetime. well, i have yet to fulfill it. I’ve had a house party, i have a nice group of friends, i get into drama (which is pretty cool), I’ve made out with a chick (not really but i’m going to say i did), i have a person to hate, i have people who hate me, but there’s something missing. I have yet to have a girlfriend. Since it’s senior year i’m getting pretty desperate. god knows what i’ll do when i’m desperate. and i’ll be damned if i don’t have a girlfriend before this year is over. fuck fuck fuck.

    -ok i’m done. sorry.

    Andy Guo, How are you? I am fine thank you. I’ve been better but i’m doing ok.

    -Today is monday which is a great day to have a day off because it i can easily segway into a 3 day weekend. Plus it also makes the week shorter which results in a much sooner weekend. This week will be fun though. There is a talent show on thursday in which i have the glorious honor of hosting. For the record, i am the host and everyone else is the co-host. So how many skits do we have? well, none actually. i really wish the talent show was so restrictive as i have a lot of cool ideas that are inappropriate. I also got ideas that seem really cool in my head but in realty it would make absolutely no sense. For instance, i would like to open the show lasers, bubbles, strobe lights, and a smoke machine. then i would come out and smash a watermelon like galiger. he was cool. regardless, hopefully the talent show will be decent. it sucks that we had to accept everyone who tried out cause we were short on acts.

    -on a side note, i am not dorothy’s friend. and frankly, i don’t understand why she is trying to befriend me. i would much rather do something of an extreme/crazy factor then become her friend. I hope for kirby’s sake that they are not friends again. and i hope that heinous dorothy will pay for her heinous crimes. they are unforgiveable and i hope everyone realizes how evil she is before it is too late. i urge you fellow americans to stand together in this time of need and unite to fight the titan of terror which is dorothy. thank you thank you.
i wish i could do that for my motivational speech.

    -Hmmm…interesting. So how does everyone know about my secret blog, i mean it’s secret for a reason. And why does everyone want to read my fucked up screen play? Doesn’t make sense to me dude. I mean, holy people like sammie and kate want to read it. Strange i know, trust me, it surprised me. The shit i write is really fucked up but the twist is that most of it is based on true events. Well, i guess i will continue writing screenplay and perhaps on a rare day we just might film it. Oh, and i’m calling it Kamakazi Cherry Bomb. What does it mean? well, i’ll break it down. Cherry – the thing broken when you stick it in a chick. Bomb – something that explodes. Kamakazi – a japanese word meaning wind or something. you just kill yourself i think. So the title of the shot is about making a cherry explode purposely or something. i dunno, it sounds cooler in my head.

    So let me explain what this “Dinner” was about. The posse included me, will, ellie, christina, sammie, and kate. We arrived at 7 as christina had told us to. but son of a bitch she isn’t there and they had just started to leave highland falls sooo i just huffed some paint and went to play guitar hero with will at gamestop. pretty crazy. will kept farting. anyway, the girls arrive and i’m freaking out cause i’m in my car huffing paint cause guitar hero got boring. i threw that shit away and went to friday’s. so we sit down and we order shit and i’m playing with my crayons. and everyone kept talking to me and it really confused me. Some topics we talked about were 1.My Screenplays, obviously tim has been telling everyone how greatly fucked up they are. 2. How we all share hate for dorothy. Yes, it was music to me ears. I’ve been planning this since the day dorothy crossed. i told you that bitch was going to pay what she owe. I am turning everyone againest her. It’s awesome. even sammie hates her, sweet. Kate said she doesn’t care but she probably hates her too. So we’re all talking about how dorothy is a bitch and i’m just siting there laughing getting this paint off my hands which i though was sour cream at first. I ordered little hamburgers and potatoe skins. it didn’t taste as great as i thought it would in my head. regardless it was fun.

    -sooo yea, great day, great day.

This is Episode 5.

The Gang Gets Aid with AIDS.

7:02 AM on a Thursday

[Scene opens with Tim and Jackie making out, the gang is
hanging out at the usual locker.]

Andy: What Up Bitches! Did you see the new Sunny in
Philadelphia episode last night? It’s probably a bad idea but I want to do coke
really bad. Not coke the soda but cocaine the drug. Do they have it at rite
aid?

Robb: ummm…you’re fucking dumb dude. Huffing that paint
really fucked your brain up. But that’s ok little Andy, we’ll take care of you.

Andy: What dude? That’s crazy. If anything huffing paint has
made me smarter. So smart…

Robb: whatever man, I still think you should stop huffing
glue.

(Will enters from the door)

Will: Yo guys did you get this letter yesterday? It’s
fucking nuts dude. It says that someone in our school has AIDS.

Andy: whoa whoa, does that mean someone in our school needs
me to aid them?

Robb: No dude, obviously it’s an acronym that stands for
Asshole Inserted Dyke Syndrome. Pretty serious. It’s when you’re in a lesbian
relationship and you’re the dyke but you still take it in the ass soo your also
gay. It’s a double paradox. You got to experience it to know what I mean dude.

Will: you are both fucking dumb. AIDS is a fucking disease
where you have a fucked up immune system.

Robb: whoa, Mr. Bio here. Shit. Does it say who has it?

Will: No, and that’s freaking me out.

Andy: what the fuck? Dude, I don’t want any aids shit on me.
FUCK! I need more glue.

[Credits Roll]

[Scene opens with the gang in P.E.]

Will: Okay guys, this is a very serious matter. Since I’m
the leader I propose we find out who the victim is and then tell everyone so
that everyone can be safe from him/her.

Robb: Whoa! Who made you leader? I’m the leader and I say we
find the victim and then scare him/her with a scary costume or some shit like
that.

Will: shaggy. First of all this is not Scooby fucking doo.
And 2^nd I am the leader because anyone holding a fucking pole vault
pole all the time is not fit to lead.

Robb: I already told you that holding this pole makes me run
faster so fuck you.

Andy: (huffing glue) guys I can’t take this anymore. We got
to find out who this asshole with Aids is and kill him/her. Sure huffing paint
can kill you but c’mon, AIDS is a little too much.

Robb: ummm….killing it would be a little tooo extreme dude.
You got to stop huffing glue, it’s making you retarded man.

Andy: what?

Robb: Nothing.

Will: let’s figure this out like human beans. Who could it
be? It must be someone who isn’t in school a lot or skips school a lot. Hmmmm….

Robb: Probably someone who has mood swings and is very
dramatic cause I read on Aids week newsly that Symptoms of AIDS include daily
periods.

Andy: what dude? That’s crazy. That’s like every girl at O’Neil.

(Christina Joins the Conversation)

Christina: Heeeeey Guys!

Andy: hmmmm…why are you so happy all the time? Are you
holding?

Christina: What! Teeheee lol haha

Andy: ummmm…I can pay you in blowjobs?

Robb: Fuck Andy, calm down. This is why we never get any
chicks, shit!?!? Anyway, What up Christina? Do you know who the person with
AIDS is? Cause I sure as hell don’t know.

Christina: ooooo yea, don’t tell anyone I told you but its
Dorothy.

Will: That’s totally logical and makes perfect sense. I am
dumb.

Andy: Oh Shit! No way! Fuck!!?!? I need more glue. (Huffs
Paint) Shit!?! It isn’t working. I need something stronger!
Co-cok-cocaine…CRACK!! I need crack.

Kirby: I’ll suck yo dick for 10 bucks.

[Scene Opens with the gang at the lunch table eating food.]

(Andy’s eyes are bloodshot from all the cocaine and paint he
did. He’s freaking out hardcore.)

Robb: dude your fly is open.

Andy: what? Wh-why is it open? I didn’t even go to the
bathroom.

(Awkward silence. We all know who has AIDS)

Dorothy: (Dramatically) So Andy, I hear you’ve been telling
everyone I have AIDS. Just to let you know spreading false rumors is illegal
and I would kindly appreciate it if you would stop.

Andy: o_o

Will: dude, Andy is bugging out.

Robb: hmmmm no he’s good dude. Cocaine is a depressant.

Andy: Shit! I can’t take this. I’m going to the bathroom oh
gawd.

[In the bathroom]

Andy: shit shit shit shit shit shit!

Will: dude, Dorothy was giving you the stare man, something’s
going down.

Andy: what? No. wait, really? Well, maybe if she didn’t fuck
all those guys she wouldn’t have aids and shit. I mean, I understand having
sexual urges, that’s why god invented Masturbation. Masturbation is what
prevents us from raping people, its essential key in life. But simply having
sex with other people is a big mistake. That’s why god invented AIDS. It makes
perfect sense if you look at it from a clean perspective and correlate it
correctly. Let’s think outside the box and stop living in this fishbowl life.
Will let’s do something no one has ever done before. Lets cross the line, let’s
break boundaries, let’s hop the fence of decency. Let’s have homosexual
intercourse.

Will: Dude, that’s some strong crack you got there. Let me
see that. (Tastes some) What the fuck dude, this is just flour and sugar. God
damnit Andy stop being gay.

Alex Ryan: hahahaha

Will: Fuck you Alex no one fucking likes you stop following
us around.

[The gang is in public speaking class]

Robb: Andy aren’t you giving your speech today?

Andy: the fuck? I think soo…. Hmmmm let me think. Yes.

Robb: well dude, you ready?

Andy: oh yea totally, I’ll just read what I wrote here. I
got it all prepared and shit. HAHA! Let me huff some more glue.

Robb: that’s paint. Go for it!

(Andy Approaches podium and reads his speech)

Andy: Hello everyone. You like me good. Love you feel it.
Thanks. People think and it feels good. What are you thinking? Sex. The twelfth
amendment is nice eating the table. Please, you care you can make a difference make
a good feeling on the world. Making good it’s fun so good. Do it do it. Murder
she wrote wholesome at is. Corn fed up with this shit. Sun. if you want love
then for go it. Just go for it. Happiness with follow. Fuck you mr.gale. even
you can make it some good I will have has. Fun is nice to make so happen as you
do it with my way. I will leave you power good.

(everyone is confused and mr.gale gives andy a bad grade
anyway. Andy is suspended.)

[Scene opens with the gang in the parking lot]

Robb: Dorothy is dumb.

Will: well yea, AIDS and Dorothy kinda go together like ass
and shit.

(tim arrives)

Tim: yo guys, whats up!

Robb: nothing, I just can’t believe Dorothy has AIDS. She
was the one!

Tim: ummm….I’m pretty sure she doesn’t have AIDS guys.

Will: what? Of course she does. She’s always dramatic and
shit. Definitely a sign of AIDS.

Tim: actually, I’m the person who has AIDS. I hate to be the
bearer of bad news but I am the one with aids. It happened when my boyfriend
blasted my ass. It was big, I had to squeeze my butt cheeks really hard to get
it out afterwards. I mean, it was fun at the time but now I really regret doing
it. Other than having sex with men, this is probably the gayest thing I have
done. Sorry guys, but you are wrong, it wasn’t Dorothy. It was in fact me.

Robb: well………………………………….Fuck.

 

-End

What Up Bitches! i’d like to give you a blog since i’ve been away for so long…yea

Anyway, i turned in my Sr. Superlatives on friday. it was pretty crazy. Mainly because i don’t know who to put for dumb shit like “cheesy pick-up line” or “late to own wedding”. i put alex holland for anything i don’t know. but for anyone wondering, Dorothy, my mortal piece of shit enemy got most dramatic which i am very happy about. Actually i have no idea what else to write soooo yea. Excerpt from Katie Joe. a thousand Kudos to you.

Class Couple – JJ and Jill
Most Artistic – Me and Andy G
Most Creative – JD and Brie
Best Dressed – Ellie and Cory B
Demon Drivers – Holland and Bruce
Space Cadets – Chloe and Greg N
Cheesy Pick Up Line – Caroline and Matt H
Best Eyes – John N and Heather
Music Video – Ali M and Emilio
Most Likely to Succeed – Allison G and Mikey P
Most Changed – Suzy and Shaun
Class Clowns – Kelly D and Will M
Best Looking – John M and Jeanne
Typical Seniors – Will H and ??
Best Smile – Robb (I think) and ??
Most Dramatic – Dorothy and ??

This is my next article for the school news paper. it’s my speech for running for the next presidental race.

Hello fellow american, this you should vote me. i leave power. good. thank you. thank you. if you vote me i’m hot. what? taxes they’ll be lower. sun. the democratic vote for me is right thing to do philadelphia. so do.

    -What up Bitches! So yea, huffing paint/glue is not a good idea. Sure it gets the job done but think of all the brain cells your killing. Not to mention the chances thats your organs will be fucked up. Sooooo i’m never huffing paint again, although it was very awesome. what the fuck am i going to do with the sock now!

    -I have a blog, i’ve had it for 1046 days, according to xanga. thats a major dude. i’ve had this for about 3 years? and i still write in it. very awesome i think. Will never writes in his anymore. he’s a bitch. Speaking of bitch, have i told you how dorothy is one? well, just throwing that out there. Also, i really like Lifesaver Gummies. The flavor crystals explode in my mouth.

    -You know what? I have a learning disability. I am dyslexic and it’s pretty cool. fuck, i don’t know to write.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2dquYX9cpU]

    -Wow! 2 entries in a row. i’m on fire. and lately i’ve grown to love writing cool about stuff. Here’s my latest article for the school newspaper.

Headline: People in the World
People in the world are cool. most of them are normal like you and me.
some of us go to school but some of us go to jobs. some of us have jobs
at schools. which is like an oxymoron but yet still cool. after working
at a job or going to school most people come home to do some other cool
stuff. for instance people could make jello, play monopoly, watch
television, or talk to the family about the day’s events. i like to
spend time in front of the fire place with the family reading the
Odyssey because the Odyssey is a great book. I don’t writing odyssey so
i’ll just abbreviate odyssey. it is good and should read it. In english
we had to rerad it and was cool but i didn’t really read it.. i think
the test was pretty hard. some other cool things you can do when you
are bored is bake a cake, go ice skating, go swimming, go dancing, and
cool. the world is great, you like it good as much as i do. there are
some things that aren’t that cool though. but you have to like it
anyway cause it’s there and you got to do stuff to keep bored yourself.
so america, please favor me a do and have fun with you time and
effectively. cool.

BTW, New it’s always in philadelphia tonight at 10.

-Remember when i told you about the TV show and shit? well here it is for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy. Comments, Suggestions, hate mail are all greatly appreciated. i am so going to hell for this.

The Gang Gets a
Vasectomy.

7:10 AM – On a Monday

[Scene opens with Tim making out with Jackie.]

William: God damnit. I can’t believe the Mets lost again. It
makes no sense. I thought coached liked them because they were actually good.

Robb: Are you kidding the Mets suck dick. But let’s tell
Andy to congratulate Coach on the Mets victory. That stupid chink won’t even
know, he’s sports retarded.

[Andy arrives through the doors]

Andy: what up bitches!

Robb: Andy you fucker, why didn’t you hang out this weekend?
You fucking bailed again.

Andy: yea….I was doing shit with something.

Will: what’s that suppose to mean?

Robb: all you did was masturbate all weekend.

Andy: well shit, I jack off so what? I’d do it every second
of every single day if I could.

Robb: Dude, nooo you can’t. It’s impossible.

Andy: yea I can!

Robb: well then, is that a challenge asshole?

Andy: Fucking shit yea.

[Theme Song plays with the fucking credits and shit]

Will: So dude, you going to jack off every second of every single
day?

Andy: no  no no, I
just have to fill this bottle up with a gallon of jizz in a week.

Will: Whoa, that’s crazy dude. Your penis will be falling
off or it’ll be fucked up pretty badly.

Andy: what? No way. I fill up like 3 gallons of jizz every
week and that’s only on bad weeks.

Will: Well, if you want any help just ask.

Andy: no dude, that’s gay. I think I’ll just pace myself,
you know. Like I’ll jack off once then I’ll wait a few seconds then I’ll jack
off again. It makes perfect sense dude. I mean, I’m no rocket scientist but I
think it’s a pretty sweet plan. I’m going to win this fucking bet. Now if
you’ll excuse me I have to get started.

Will: Whoa whoa whoa whoa! Now? In school? You’re crazy
dude.

Andy: Am I will? AM I?!? I will fuck your mother!

[Andy wanders off with a box of tissues. Paper not muscle.]

[Next scene opens with Robb and Will chatting about like
chickens in a coop]

Will: dude, what are you doing with that pole vault pole?

Robb: (laughs out loud) are you kidding? It makes your run
faster. Everyone knows that silly.

Will: ok……

Robb: is Andy seriously going to get a gallon of jizz?

Will: yea man, he’s in the bathroom right now.

Robb: what is he using?

Will: how the fuck should I know?

(A hot chick walks by, (will probably be played by some dumb
slut/Kirby))

Robb: yo dude, is that the chick you like? You should
definitely go talk to her. She told me she wants your hot steaming stick in her
vaginal canal of slippery sweetness. Seriously, she told me that. Word for
Word. No joke.

Will: What? No way. That just might be gross enough to work.

(Will Walks up to Kirby)

Will: Hey baby, I want to stick my throbbing baby maker in
your tight hallway of sexuality.

Kirby: Awesome! I’ll suck your dick for 10 bucks.

Will: sweet! And after if you want to we can have sex.
Uuuuhhh ahhhhh you’re an asshole.

[In this scene we have the gang and some other assholes at
the lunch table enjoying a hardy lunch.]

(Andy is quivering and pale)

Robb: dude, you okay? You don’t look so good. If you don’t
want to do this you don’t have to. Just putting that out there.

Andy: Okay?! Do I look okay to you? Fuck! (Takes out a
gallon half full of jizz) See this? It’s my fucking jizz. My dick is about to
fall off and your asking me if I’m okay? Fuck you!!! AHHH!!!

Robb: whoa dude, calm down. Just looking out for your
well-being. I care you know, I’d like to say I’m more of modern day jesus.
Someone who can help people and at the same time change the world.

(Will and Kirby making out. Sweet)

Dorothy: Andy, sweetheart. You need to calm down, ok?

Andy: (Andy’s eye’s open widely as if otherworldly rage is
about to explode into a tornado of verbal death) ok

(Alex Ryan tries to tell a story but he’s just talking to
himself)

Tim: Guys I think I’m going to break up with Jackie.

Robb: no way! Why so?

Tim: I dunno, she’s just not my type I guess. I’m looking
for someone perhaps more in tune with me.

Robb: well, I don’t know what that means but I still think
you greats make a cute couple (Super Smile + Thumbs Up)

Dorothy: Actually, I personally think that Tim could get
someone much better. Jackie is just such a bitch, Ah ham, pardon my French.
Taxes, coffee, sex, 21, mature.

Andy: GOD DAMNIT!?!? Fuck you Dorothy, why are you talking
to me. Are we friends? Cause from my perspective we are certainly not friends. You’re
out of your fucking mind bitch. I masturbate? Yea, so what. You’re a horny sex
monger. You’re a fucking piece of shit. You give out blow jobs like they give
out pamphlets at abortion rallies. You’re the reason Judas betrayed Jesus. You
suck at soccer. Soccer sucks in generally. Jimmy fingered Kelly. I…Fucking…..
Hate you. But no, I’m not trying to be mean; I just want to know. Shit, I’m
freaking out man!!!! AHHHHH (Runs to the bathroom)

Robb: Oh my god…

Tim: Yikes, that was a little harsh. Even for me. Not really
though, I thought it was pretty cool.

(Dorothy starts to cry and runs away. Everyone in the lunch
room scream chants of praise and happiness.)

[Next Scene – Robb and will talking in the hallway. Again.]

Will: Dude, physics AP is fucking hard as shit, but not as
hard as my dick gets when I think about having sex with my girlfriend. She’s so
hot.

Robb: That’s gross dude. Could you stop cursing please? I am
very offended when you curse like that.

Will: I’ll do whatever I want cause I got a girlfriend now.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!

(Kirby comes up to will and hands him a note nicely folded
as if it was some type of eccentric origami, then walks away and gives will a
sexually induced wink]

Will: (gives a cocky smile) Yea, that’s a good little bitch.
Did I tell you she does all my homework and shit?

Robb: Dude, you’re going to hell. What does the note say?

Will: Wh-what? Uh-I- I don’t believe it. What is this shit?
She’s breaking up with me. This must be some kind of dream. Dude punch me in
the face.

Robb: Sure if you want me to. (Punches will in the face)

Will: shit, I must still be dreaming. Keep punch me. Only in
the face though cause that’s where it’s most effective.

(Robb continues to punch will repeatedly in the face)

[Scene opens with the gang getting ready to go home. At the
locker]

Robb: well, I’ll catch ya guys later! (Super Smile + Thumbs
Up)

{Video Montage of Andy
masturbating vigorously and Will crying like a little bitch}{Michael Jackson
–Thriller Playing}

[Scene opens and it’s a week later. At the locker.]

7:08 AM – on a Monday

(Andy walks through the doors and see’s Robb)

Robb: Yo Andy, what did you do this weekend? Masturbate (laughs out loud)

Andy: Here’s your fucking gallon of jizz. Enjoy it cause
this victory was fucking sweet just like my jizz. And you know what dude? I got
a vasectomy and now my Dick, does not work anymore. I hope you like that.

Robb: are you serious? Oh god…

(Will enters)

Will: (Serious Face) Guys I got a vasectomy.  It was painful and self-demoralizing. I am no
longer a man. I refuse to have sex with anyone but Kirby. She was the one. She
was the one.

Robb: You guys are freaks. You are all going to hell!?

(Kirby walks up to will)

Kirby: Hey baby, you know I didn’t really want to break up with
you. I was on my period, and the mood swings, you know all that jazz. But hey,
you wanna get together later. I’ll make it up to you if you know what I mean.

Will :(pause) Ummmmm sure…..only one problem. I got a
fucking vasectomy you dumb bitch. God damnit, this is not happening. Shit SHIT
SHIT SHIT SHIT!!! (Runs away)

Robb: Here comes Tim, thank god one of us still has our
manhood.

Tim: What up. You guys look cute today.

Robb: ummmm…ok? What did you do this weekend?

Tim: you know, I did some shit here and there. Broke up with
Jackie, played guitar hero, got a vasectomy.

Robb: (laughs out loud) very funny Tim, you’re not gay.

Tim: I’m serious dude; my dick does not work anymore. I’m
getting it removed too. Next time you see me I will be a tranny. Sorry dude but
I just don’t enjoy being a man anymore. The freedoms of being a woman. Oh I
can’t wait. Just try not to hit on me. Heehee.

Robb: This is not happening. It can’t be happening. All my
friends getting vasectomies? AHHHHHHHHH!!! (Pours gallon of jizz all over his
face. The jizz cascades gently down his body like a waterfall)

-End

    -What up bitches! First off i would like to thank the people who read my xanga. You guys come here to read interesting shit that happens so i will continue to provide that benefit for you. oh and katie joe, i give you a super smile with a big thumbs up. Anyway, on with what i was going to type.

    -We have started to write screenplays for TV shows. It’s an enduring process and i’ve learned a lot of shit. For instance, the importance of chronological order and screenplay is one word. We’ve got 3 episodes written so far.
Episode 1- Pilot
Episode 2- The Gang Gets Desperate.
Episode 3- The Gang Gets a Vasectomy.

I wrote 1 and 3, will wrote 2. I really think that if we film this (we eventually will) that it will be pretty awesome. We all play ourselves in the script and since we are the Producer/writer/actors we can basically do whatever we want. BTW, when i say “We” i mean, Me, will, and robb. The main characters. we will probably need a girl. so if you are a girl, hot, and enjoy crude humor, than we would love to have you become part of the cast. No fat chicks though. Sorry, it’s a policy we got. It keeps things regulated and shit.

    -Well, other then that we thought up of “bag man”. It’s going to be my new costume. it’ll be sweet. i’m from Bagdad, my mom is a douche bag, and my favorite food is a bag of chips. i’m Bagilious. I still hate mr.gale. No matter how hard i try he always gives me a poor grade. one day i will snap and say “Fuck you mr.gale”. that would be sweet but it would also get me suspended. yea. i’m tired. later gator.