Category: Uncategorized

Andy, stop feeling  like this. You have to pick yourself back up. No one is going to do anything for you and you have to get your life back on track. No excuses, don’t wait, get things started. There will always be an excuse, you just have to suck it up and get it done. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and stop being a bitch. Do you think girls will like a man that does nothing all day? Do this for your next girlfriend. Make something of yourself for her, so that she has something to brag about to her friends. You are nothing right now and a huge piece of shit with nothing to offer. Get a job, go back to school, and get into PA school. Don’t stop. It is suppose to be your dream job. It’s not going to be easy so you will have to put the work into it. Please Andy, please don’t be stuck. get out of this town, make lots of money, show that bitch that you are worth it and that she fucked up. Don’t let your mom down, and more importantly, don’t let yourself down. You owe this to yourself and you deserve this.

no matter how much i deny it, i still miss her so much. it feels like i just woke up from a dream. did it all really happen? i wonder what she does sometimes, and if she feels the same way. i don’t think she cares anymore.

i just want to wake up one day without feeling like a brick. the deepest and saddest thoughts are my first thoughts.

dear god,

i know i’ve been asking a lot lately. I know you only help those who help themselves. I know that sometimes you don’t always grant us what we need because it is not part of your plan. But please, i don’t want to feel like this anymore. I don’t want to hurt anymore. i don’t even want to be happy, i just want to be myself again. I want to thank you for what you have given me so far, and I appreciate it very much. I don’t want to be selfish and ask for too much so I understand if you don’t grant me this…I just want the knowledge to know what to do to get my life back on track. I am not strong, and i don’t really have anyone to help me so if there was anytime in my life that i needed help, it would be now. I hope you know what you are doing God. I don’t know why you made me such a nice person. If i was more of a jerk i wouldn’t feel this hurt right now. I hope this all leads to something greater. But even if it doesn’t, i know that it is not your obligation to grant miracles for me. I carve my own destiny i choose the roads to walk, i should be the change that i want to be. give me strength lord.

andy

I think i’ve gotten to the point where no one wants to talk to me about my sadness anymore. Everyone ignores me and i don’t really blame them, but it does show how much people really care. Lang is the best, he really understood me and was on my side the whole time. I will never forget that.

It still hurts. I saw a picture of her and it made me really sad and i would start breathing really fast to the point where my heart literally hurt. I don’t think she is going through anything like this at all. Why would she? she never cared in the first place. I got played and i lost everything in the end. I wish i got cancer and just died tomorrow.

It happened. We broke up. To fall out of love with someone that use to mean so much to you. To completely forget someone you would have done anything for. This has got to be the hardest thing in life. I’m scared to go to sleep because I might have a dream about her, waking up without her there is pretty sad. I miss her….

I have reached a milestone in my life that I believe I should document. It’s not a happy one as you can tell by the title, but i believe it’s one i should write down.

Recently, i have encountered something that i thought would never happen, not even in a million years. It occurred so suddenly that i thought it was a dream for a week. What began as simple bickering turned into the hardest travesty I will have to endure for god knows how long. You can probably guess already, but Suzie and I are on a break right now and I don’t see us getting back together. We were so perfect together, at least in my eyes. I have never met another human being i was so compatible with and so in sync. I made up my mind last year that it was the end, i was going to marry this woman and spend the rest of my life making her the happiest person in the world. Of course we fought a lot and i was stupid many of those times but those occasional smiles that she snuck in melted my heart and i would fall in love with her all over again. Nothing about her made me hate her, she was the epitome of the other half that i had envisioned spending the rest of my life with. She would fart in front of me and i would laugh with her, she would drive/take care of me when i drink too much, and she always spoke very highly of me to all her friends even though i am completely worthless. All these examples and more of the type of person she is, on top of how god damn beautiful she is…it was endgame.

Everyday literally sucked balls and i always worried about about my future. but when suzie was with me i was genuinely happy, i felt like i could accomplish everything. Her smile, her hugs, the way she always gave me confidence to do what i was too scared to do, all these things just….i don’t know.
I am so sad right now. So very sad because I know that this break will not end well and the days are counting down to when I’ll never see this person that has made such a significant impact on my life. I have tried my hardest to give her what she wants and win her back, but there is nothing i can say that can change how she feels about me. It might be the stress from school, but i really think she has fallen out of love with me. Nothing i do or say will change that. It hurts so much…the worst part is that i use to always have her be there for me to pick me up. I just can’t concentrate on anything else and i keep getting flashbacks about things that we did together and how much i miss being with her. I want to stay strong and be the man that she deserves…but i’m just so hurt and vulnerable right now. No one is here for me. I want things to just go back to the way they were…..i really miss you suzie…

Showers are so long when you are sad

If you are still wondering, yes. There are in fact still, many niggers in my life. I find it hard to keep them away from me but they seem to drown me out until suicide seems like a godsend. Statistics show that 83% of people have some form of down syndrome. That’s great and all and i’m sure i was going somewhere with this but i forgot. Anyway, i wish i had down syndrome so that i don’t have to deal with people who actually have downs.

Tumblr sucks dickballs and i tried it months ago. http://peachtaco.tumblr.com/
yep it sucks. why is it a blog when no one actually blogs. Reposting what someone else did is dumb as hellz.

iOS 7 came out and i think i was more excited about it than i should be. like, girl buying shoes happy.

I’m going to try and stop saying “like” in my sentences and when i talk because what i’m saying will still make sense if i do.

I’ve wanted to write in my blog for a while now about niggery my girlfriend is. I mean she’s really cool and all, but sometimes she’s just a super nigger!!