we’re all addicted to something that takes the pain away. I think there’s something wrong with me. I can’t shake it. It’s been months and it still lingers. This is not normal and I know what I have to do. I’ve convinced myself that I don’t deserve to be happy and that I should only do what I am suppose to regardless of what I want.
i have to numb myself so that her memories don’t haunt me anymore, distract myself by doing things I should do because I know that if there is a single moment where I’m not doing anything, I’ll end up thinking about how alone and insecure i am. How useless i am